💙 Master These Two Skills

You never listen to me!

The other day, I felt like you were more engaged with your computer than with me.

I believe that if you master these 2 skills, it can change your life.

LISTENING and QUESTIONING

It is my belief that if you master the skills of listening and questioning, you’ll alter the way you experience your life, and the results you produce.

Listening

Let’s talk about listening first. In communication, the words that a human being says—what is coming out of their mouth—only makes up 7% of communication.

If you are only listening for the words that someone says, you are failing at communication. 93% of communication comes from somebody’s eye contact, their tone of voice, body language, and the feeling and emotion they put into the communication.

Start listening in a much deeper level. Start to listen for what’s going on behind the words. Listen for the emotion that’s being projected when the human being that you are talking to is communicating. Because when you can start to listen for someone else’s emotions and feelings; their commitments; their fears; desires; challenges; their hopes and their dreams, then you can start to create a powerful human-to-human connection. You can begin to bond with them, and then they can start to really feel heard and understood. And when somebody feels heard and understood, they connect with you, and they want to be with you more, whether that’s in your personal life or in your business.

Here’s a little tip: if somebody keeps repeating themselves over and over and over again, it means they feel like they haven’t been heard. Really connect at a deeper level to their emotions so that they can feel heard, and so that you can build rapport.

Questioning

The second skill I believe that if you master, it will really change your life. It is the way you ask your questions; your questioning skills.

What I notice when I’m with people is that most of us ask closed-ended questions—which gives us a one-word response. And when we receive a one-word response, we tend to think it’s the person who’s doing the answering that is not giving us the right response.

But actually, it’s the quality of your questions that drives the response, and it’s probably not the response you want.

Start to look at the way you’re asking questions. Are you asking closed-ended questions, and only getting a one-word response? Or are you asking open, more powerful questions; questions that engage the entire person you are speaking to, so they share their experiences and what they’re feeling?

If you master listening and questioning skills, it will change your life both personally and professionally.

Ask yourself where you can develop your listening and questioning skills.

Which skill is better for you, and which one do you feel you need more practice with?

The more you connect through feelings the more your business grows.
— Sophie Boyko
 

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